


I'm glad that I'm spending this short little time with you

by Just_AnotherFangirl



Category: Black Friday - Team StarKid, The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Autistic Paul Matthews, Bisexual Emma Perkins, Bisexual Paul Matthews, Christmas, Christmas Party, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, IDK I suck at tagging, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Swearing, Ted had a crush on Paul too, This is honestly my brain vomit so ignore lacking logic, Waffles, a bit OOC, alchohol, bisexual ted (tgwdlm), brain vomit, i was scared to write it wrong so it’s not stated but.. subtext, implied tho, its barely mentioned I have too many tags about it, paul had a crush on ted as a teenager and you can’t convince me otherwise, references to tcb stuff, they were pining teens with no clue, wayward guide for the untrained eye reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:36:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27638317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_AnotherFangirl/pseuds/Just_AnotherFangirl
Summary: Cliche paulkins fluffy Thanksgiving/Christmas thing with some fake dating
Relationships: Alice/Deb (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals), Bill & Paul Matthews, Charlotte & Paul Matthews, Charlotte/Sam (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals), Charlotte/Ted (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals), Paul Matthews & Melissa, Paul Matthews & Ted, Paul Matthews/Emma Perkins
Comments: 57
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first long starkid fic, and I promise it’s got a schedule! I have most of it written already anyways. I’m not sure on the total chapter number, but the fic itself is about 10k.  
> For now the next chapter will be Monday, and then next Thursday, after that weekly, I haven’t decided on a day yet.  
> Also thanks @venusplease for helping me pick a title that was greatly appreciated like you wouldn’t believe

Paul pulled down his sleeves as he rushed into Beanies. He was late already, but at least there wasn’t too long a line. When he reached the front, he was cut off before he could talk by the pretty barista wordlessly handing him a black coffee. 

“How did you know-“

“That you wanted this? Dude, you order the same thing every day.” She scoffed. “I saw you come in and poured a cup, it saved me time.”

“Oh.” Paul took a sip. “Well, I’ll have to leave a big old tip just for you!” He raised his cup slightly and laughed awkwardly, pulling out a ten dollar bill. 

The barista stared at him curiously. “Just for me? I don’t have to share that with anyone else?”

“Yeah, I don’t give a shit about them.”

She pocketed the money, smiling at Paul. “Well, thanks. And if you don’t mind, I need to get back to my job..” she waved an arm at the line behind him.

“Oh, sorry.” He nearly sprinted out of the coffee shop, accidentally leaving his wallet on the counter. 

  
  


Emma poured another drink absently,thinking about that last customer. He had been so incredibly awkward. He was odd, always ordering the same drink, the kinda bug eyes, the.. a tall woman tapped her on the shoulder. 

“Excuse me, but do you have a lost and found? The man in front of me left his wallet on the counter, and he already drove away.”

“Oh, I’ll take it. I’ll see him tomorrow, I can give it to him then.” She held out her hand, but the woman refused to hand it over.

“You people working in coffee shops get paid so little, I don’t trust you to not steal this. Direct me to your lost and found, please.” 

Emma sighed, snatching the wallet before the woman could react. 

“Hey! I’ll be reporting you to the HFPD for theft if you don’t give that back!”

Oh. That was.. not a great option. Fake story time fake story time- “It’s my boyfriends wallet.” Oh,  _ shit _ that's a bad cover story. 

“Really?” The woman raised an eyebrow. 

“Yes,” Emma said, a false sweetness dripping from her tongue, leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. The bitter taste was imagined, but still. “Now, can I get back to work, ma’am? Here’s your latte.” She said with a bright, cheery, fake smile.

The woman still eyed her, but took her drink and sat down.

  * ••



The sun shone bright on a new day, missed by most of Hatchetfield. By the time most of the town was awake, it had been replaced with grey skies and a drizzle of rain, just heavy enough to be annoying.

Emma Perkins was walking through that rain, slowly being soaked through, when a car pulled past her slowly. 

“Hey!” She shouted, recognizing the driver. “Black coffee guy! I have your wallet!” 

If Emma had seen herself in that moment, she would have thought she was crazy, and rightfully so, considering how much of a mess she looked. Luckily, Paul didn’t think so, and pulled over. 

“Dude!” Emma reached into her pocket, pulling out his wallet. 

Paul rolled down his window, taking his wallet. He took a careful look at Emma’s wet clothes and bedraggled hair, considered the idea, ignored his overwhelming fear, and spoke. “Do you need a ride? You look.. a little wet.”

Emma eyed him for a moment, but his face was perfectly innocent, and she was sure black coffee guy didn’t realize what the situation could be read as.

“Alright. I have pepper spray, though.” She dug around in her purse for a moment, pulling out something shiny. “Also a pocket knife.” She waved it in his face, holding it tight, as she climbed into his car.

Realization dawned on black coffee guy’s face. “Oh I’m so sorry I didn’t even realize that might be bad to offer, I would never do that I respect women and consent-“

“It’s fine.” Emma cut him off. “Just know I will not hesitate to stab you.”

“Alright.” Paul was frankly, terrified but a little turned on. “So, you’re going to Beanies?”

  * ••



By the time Emma’s shift was over and she was walking to the community college, she had thoroughly overanalyzed every second of conversation with black coffee guy to make sure he wasn’t a creep, and realized she didn’t know his name. To be fair, he probably didn’t know her name, which was probably for the best. Even though from what she’d seen of him, he didn’t seem too creep-like, if a bit harsh, Emma didn’t need another stalker. She had also realized how incredibly romcom that had seemed, showing up soaking wet, especially when she could have just waited for him to show up at Beanies.

  * •• 



“You want a caramel frappe, Bill?”

Bill didn’t respond, but Ted stuck his head out from around the corner. “Are you going to Beanies? You didn’t invite me.”

“Sorry, Ted.” Paul gulped. “You wanna come?” 

“Well, you clearly need a wingman to help you get with the  _ latte hottay _ .” 

“I don’t know what you mean, Ted.” 

“Oh, c'mon, you know who. That little barista, the one you're scared to speak to.”

“I’m not scared!” Paul burst out, immediately regretting it. “I talked to her this morning, when I gave her a ride.” 

“Ohh,” Ted leaned back, whistling. “Did you fuck the barista Paul? I didn’t think you had it in you.”

“I gave her a ride when she gave back my wallet, because I left it at Beanies yesterday.” 

“Hmph. Knew you didn’t have it in you. But that’s why you have me!” Ted elbowed Paul, grinning. 

The pair walked into beanies, and Emma glanced up when the bell jingled, shooting Paul a small smile. He blushed as Ted poked him. 

“Are you sure you didn’t fuck her?”

“I'm sure, Ted.”

When they got to the front of the line, Emma had his coffee ready for him.

“Here you go, right on time.” She smiled up at him. 

Paul rummaged around in his wallet, pulling out some cash which he stuffed in the tip jar, and pretended not to notice as Emma pulled it right back out. 

“You see, Sheryl! Your boy has gotten himself a girlfriend! She told me herself, can you believe he hasn’t told you yet?”

The woman who had threatened to report Emma for theft walked in, talking loudly with another woman. Paul turned around at the loud noise and paled, seeing the woman she was with. 

“Are you alright?” The petite barista asked, seeing him go pale.

“Me? No.”

Paul had unfortunately forgotten about Ted, who had known him when they were teenagers, so by extension, knew his parents. 

“His mom is over there.” Ted grinned evilly, but for once in his life, stayed quiet. Unluckily, they were still noticed. Emma looked over to the two women, and cringed. She muttered something explicit under her breath.

“Oh, Paul! And Ted! I wasn't expecting to see you two here!” Mrs. Matthews rushed over, kissing Paul on the cheek. “Oh, and is this the young lady Janet tells me is your girlfriend?” She turned to gestures towards Emma, who was as still and confused as Paul. “Why didn’t you tell me you had found yourself a girl?”

“Mom, this isn’t my-“

“-Well, we haven’t put a label on it yet.” Emma interrupted, apologetically mouthing something at Paul that he guessed was ‘I’m so sorry I’ll explain when she leaves’, though it also looked a lot like ‘yam stew floppy mouth bandaging’, still, Paul went with the first one.

“Yeah, mom, I didn’t want to tell you until it was official.” Paul winced. He was a terrible liar, and was still incredibly confused. 

“Well, you just  _ need _ to bring this young lady- what was your name?”

“Emma.”

“You just  _ need  _ to bring Emma to Thanksgiving, so we can all get to know her.”

Ted was still watching from the outskirts, smirking as he imagined the various ways Paul could try to get out of this. A couple ended with his coworker banging the barista, and he hoped that would be the way things went, cause jeez, did the guy need to loosen up. 

If Nora had showed up, Emma would currently be in deep shit, but luckily for her, Beanies was nearly empty, and there was no line anymore.

Paul was still bewildered and had already proved himself to be a pretty shitty liar, so Emma chimed in again. “I’ll do my best to be there! I have a busy schedule, but I might be able to make it!”

“Oh, wonderful!”

Once Mrs. Matthews was gone, Emma let out a long breath. “I am so sorry black coffee- Paul. Paul, right? I didn’t hear wrong?” He nodded, so the petite woman continued. “I am so sorry, I panicked, the woman with her accused me of stealing your wallet so I lied and said you were my boyfriend so I had to keep lying so I wouldn’t get arrested or something. You can pretend to break up with me tomorrow cause I cheated on you, my reputation among the old people of Hatchetfield can’t get any worse.”

Ted saw his opening and joined the conversation.

“Oh Paul, are you really gonna 

let her treat you like that? Breaking up so soon?” He chortled.

“You know what Ted, you’re right.” Paul said firmly.

“Wait, what?” 

“Emma, right?”

Emma nodded, confused and curious.

“Well Emma, if you aren’t busy on Thanksgiving, would you like to pretend to be my girlfriend? I want to avoid being questioned by my mother, and such a fast breakup would mean questions, and maybe even the horror of an entire coffee date. I know you probably have family, but once I heard your boss asking if you'd learned to make decent coffee in Guatemala so you're probably from there and it's too far to travel for thanksgiving, so maybe?” 

Emma stared at him for a moment, before a smile spread slowly across her face. Oversharing was typical of black coffee Paul from what she’d seen, so she supposed the scene was relatively normal.

“Paul, that sounds like a shitload of fun. As long a you don’t try to murder me on the way there, I’m all in.” 

Ted watched the pair stare at each other for a moment before he coughed. “Can I get my chai iced tea or what?” He snapped twice, and considering he had just watched quite a long conversation and not gotten his drink, it was a bit fair. Still, pretty asshole-ish.

“I heard you, asshole. You don’t have to snap at me like I’m a dog.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get further into the thick of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s not a ridiculously long chapter, but a LOT happens. I hope you guys like my brain vomit so far?

“Paul!” Mellissa stopped him as he walked back into CCRP, holding her clipboard right to her chest, as always. “I’m having a little get together, you’re coming, it’s in three days.” 

“Sorry, I can’t make it-“ Paul started to say apologetically 

“But you have nothing planned. I checked your schedule, I can see everybody’s calendars, remember?”

“Well, I have something that just came up, so I haven’t had time to schedule it.” Paul said unsteadily.

“Really? What is it?”

“Um, babysitting. Yes, that’s right. I’m babysitting Alice.”

“Paul, she’s seventeen and isn’t going to be in Hatchetfield this weekend.”

“I guess I’ll be coming, then. I totally forgot that it was next weekend!” 

“Sure, Paul. Sure.” Mellissa smiled, ticking something off on her clipboard.

Paul sighed, pulling out his phone to schedule it. Mellissa was hard to say no to, and hey, at least there would be alcohol, right?

  * ••



There was alcohol. Paul was getting progressively drunker, but had only arrived about half an hour ago, so he still hadn’t had a chance to get that drunk.

He took another sip of the fruity, colourful drink he had been given, looking up. 

“Heyyy! Black coffee guy!” Emma flung an arm over his shoulder, only with minimal struggle, considering how short she was. “Wait no, you’re Paul, right? You know, I’m an angel to put up with your pretty little face every day,” She tried to deposit herself in his lap, but fell off and did an odd little spin as she stood up. “And now I’m gonna spend even  _ more _ time with you, so you owe me.” Emma rapped that pretty little face on the nose, “you should pay me,” She leaned in close to Paul. “With a kiss.”

Paul stood up abruptly and took Emma by the elbow. “I’m not going to kiss you, Emma.”

“Whyyy?” She hung off him as he led her to the kitchen for a glass of water.

“You are very drunk, and I don’t think you’ll remember much of this tomorrow.” 

For a moment Paul wondered how she knew Melissa, and both Emma and Melissa were not fit to answer.

Emma woke up the next morning in her apartment, tucked into bed, with no idea how she’d gotten there. She had lost her phone quickly last night, so there’s no way she had called somebody, so someone must have taken her home. At least she was still dressed, right? Emma leaned over to check her phone, squinting at the bright light. There was a note on the table in unfamiliar handwriting. 

_ ‘morning. I brought you home last night I hope you don’t mind _

_ also I realized I don’t have your number so here’s mine _

_ drink water _

_ -paul (black coffee guy)’ _

Shiiiit. Emma was not proud of how she acted when she got drunk enough, and judging by the large chunk of memory loss, she had gotten drunk enough.

_ hey paul  _

_ it’s emma _

_ yknow im gonna need some specifics if im ur fake gf _

_ also how drunk did I get? I don't remember much of it _

He responded quickly, which Emma wasn’t expecting, since he should have been at work. Wait, it was Saturday. 

_ Hi Emma _

_ It’s Paul  _

He deleted the message, but not quick enough to avoid Emma seeing.

_ Sorry for looking in your wallet for your address _

_ its fine _

_ Okay. You’re going to be my fake gf from 4 to whenever we can escape, on the 26th. I can come by and pick you up, my parents live across town _

_ k cool but how drunk was I _

_ Well you were tripping over your feet every two seconds and tried to sit in my lap, but fell off.  _

_ oh so I was drunk drunk please forget that _

_ I’m not totally sure I can _

_ Dude _

_ I looked like a fool _

_ You looked fine _

_ You faced down my mom nothing is more badass than that _

_ Yeah why are you so against your mom? She seemed nice. _

_ Sry if that’s overstepping _

_She’s too much_ _for me, nosy,vaguely homophobic, and she has an ideal view for her life that isn’t working out, so she forces me into making it_

_ Oh _

_ Yeah _

-Monday morning- 

“Hey, Paul?” Bill leaned over to talk to the other man. 

“Yeah, Bill?”

“Are you going to be coming over again this Christmas? Alice gets to come on Christmas day this year, and she really likes you! It would be such a fun surprise if she woke up and you were there!”

“I guess I'll come, Bill, but I can only stay for a while. I might have to go to Christmas dinner, if Thanksgiving goes badly enough. ”

Bill frowned, skipping over the last part of the sentence. . “Is it with your parents? I thought they did Christmas eve?”

“They decided to do Christmas this year, so my cousin might be there.”

“Oh,” Bill winced. While Bill usually didn’t like to talk bad about people, he made a few exceptions, and one of them was for this cousin. The man was just so  _ annoying _ . “Sorry about that, Paul.”

“Oh, who are you spending Thanksgiving with, Paul? Are you going to your mothers?” A quieter voice asked. 

“He has a date with the little barista at Beanies,” Ted stepped into the conversation, Charlotte close on his heels. Charlotte loved to hear about everyone's little tidbits of gossip, but it was odd that she would look this happy this close to holidays about togetherness. Charlotte wanted a quiet day with Sam, but Sam would go and spend the day with some college girl. Charlotte pretended not to know, but nobody gets shifts on every big holiday, every year. . While she still got a little excited that maybe he would stay home for both days with her, the redhead knew what to expect, and was dampened around the holiday season.

“Really?” Bill said, excited.

“Oh, Paul, that's wonderful!” Charlotte exclaimed.

“It's not a date, Ted. We have an arrangement so I don't have to spend time with my mother.”

Bill and Charlottes faces fell. 

“So you still haven't worked up the guts to ask her out?”

“Wh-” Paul tried, not very well, to fake confusion. 

“I thought you two were dating already, Paul. You stare at her like that, like you’re in love.”

“No I don’t! And why would you know what someone in love looks like-” Paul realized what he was saying a second too late. 

Charlotte went still, and stared at him, despair in her eyes. 

“Charlotte I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to say that-“ Paul said, tripping over his words. 

She left, and Paul put his head in his hands. “Shit.”

“That was low, Paul.” Ted said with a scowl before going after the woman.

“She knows I didn’t mean it, right, Bill?”

Bill patted his shoulder. “Charlotte knows you didn’t mean it, but it might be good to go after her.”

  * ••



“Heard you were a piece of shit today. I mean, I’m paraphrasing, but you get the gist.” Emma said casually as she filled Paul’s cup up. She had stopped making his drinks ahead of time for some reason, so Paul was spending more time in Beanies, but he didn’t mind. “You and your coworkers all overshare a lot.”

“Who told you that?” Paul said nervously. Ted was sure to paint him in the worst light.

“The guy who’s usually really cheerful, he has a teen daughter? Her girlfriend smokes in the parking lot sometimes with the Foster kid, she shared with me once.”

“Bill.” Paul clarified gratefully, before realizing the rest of Emma’s sentence. “You took weed from a kid? And Alice's girlfriend? Does Alice smoke?”

Emma waved him off casually, leaning on the counter. “Nah, the girlfriend's good about it, stops when she shows up. And the girlfriend offered it to me, don’t worry, Paul.”

“I should ask Alice about that when I go over on Christmas.” Paul said worriedly. 

“Woah, you really care about the kid.” Emma raised a hand. “ I promise, I’ve never seen her smoking.” 

Paul relaxed slightly, but he was still worrying the edges of his sleeves. “Ok.”

“So, what did you do?” Emma pulled off her apron and went to sit down.

Paul winced. “I made a dig about Sam.”

“Sam like asshole cop Sam?” Emma balked. “That dick who flirts with Zoey? He’s married? And to that lady who wears the cat sweater?” 

“Charlotte, and yes. She knows he’s cheating but can’t get herself to admit things can’t work out with them.”

“Her? I thought she and the moustache asshole had a thing.”

“Oh, I’m pretty sure they do too. But still, I was a dick.”

“Oh, Paul. You were. But you seem like you feel really bad, and judging from my three or so times talking to you face to face, you seem like a good guy.” 

There were a few moments of awkward silence before Paul spoke up. 

“So, Guatemala?”

“Yeah.” Emma laughed. “I left here not long after I graduated high school, I spent the last ten years there. It’s beautiful, you should see a sunset on top of a mountain there. Gorgeous. 

“Cool. I've never left Hatchetfield, the coolest thing I’ve seen is a raccoon.” Paul joked. 

“Oh, they have these things there, coatimundi, these little raccoon things! They knock over trash cans and shit, just like raccoons.” 

“Wow, even the raccoons you’ve seen are cooler than mine.” 

“Not raccoons, coatimundi.” 

“Coatimundi.” 

Emma jumped as Nora stuck her head out the door. 

“Emma! Get back to work!” 

“Welp, gotta go, Paul. See you.” 

She scurried away, and Paul watched her for a moment before heading out the door.

He was halfway to CCRP before he realized he'd left his coffee at Beanies. “Fuck!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you, too, simp for Emma Perkins, you’re legally obligated to comment /j  
> If it’s past 11 try to sleep and go drink some water please! I hope you’re liking all this! ~sand


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The moment you’ve all been waiting for

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YES it goes into the fake dating part already don’t @ me  
> This took so long to write please appreciate it  
> Also I’m pretty sure I have an update schedule now? I should be posting every Thursday till New Years, with a missing week somewhere in there maybe if I’m bad enough at math

Paul was, to put it simply, falling apart with anxiety. He had to pretend the pretty Beanies barista was his girlfriend while under his mother’s scrutiny, and now he knew Alice’s girlfriend was smoking but he couldn’t tell Bill, then Alice would be smothered.

Paul paced back and forth in the hallway, waiting for Emma to answer the door. He fiddled with his sleeves, tugging his jacket down, ignoring the itch of the fabric. He only had two nice jackets, and he made sure to wear the one with the nice texture to work, which left the bad one for other days. Today, Paul had to wear the other one, and it was not nice. Now if Emma would just answer the door they could get to his parents house and he could take off the jacket-

Emma opened the door and peered out at him, worry etched onto her face. “Are you alright?” 

Paul scratched at his wrists, becoming increasingly aware of the fabric scratching at his skin. “I’m fine, let’s go.”

“Paul,” Emma started, but hesitated. She honestly hadn’t spent that much time with him, despite how comfortable they were around each other, she didn’t want to overstep. “Okay, yeah, let’s go.” 

Paul winced as he rang the doorbell. 

“You cool?”

“I’m fine. I just get uncomfortable when I’m here, I just can't stand the sound of their doorbell.” Paul said lightheartedly, clearly covering up with half jokes.

“Paul! You made it, and finally brought your girl!” Paul’s mother answered the door, interrupting whatever Emma was going to say. “It’s Emma, right? Oh, it’s so lovely to meet you. We’ll have to get to know each other, let me decide if you’re a good choice for a daughter in law. Remember, Mom’s got the final say.” She winked. “Now, come inside, I need to introduce you to Paul’s brother and his wife.”

Paul and Emma followed her inside, Emma slipping on her customer service personality that she barely used, despite working at Beanies, and Paul violently twisting his coat sleeve. 

“Matthew! Paul is here, and he brought his girlfriend!”

Emma was expecting the man who poked around the corner to be taller, like Paul and his mother. Instead, he was just average height, with a stocky build. 

“Paul.” 

Paul itched at his coat sleeves again. “Matthew. Emma, this is Matthew.” 

“You’re the guy that came into Beanies and on your way out, dropped the coffee in the trash! I know you!” Emma exclaimed. “I spat in his coffee.” She whispered into Paul’s ear, up on her highest tiptoes. 

“Oh. You.” Matthew said bitterly. He directed his attention to Paul. “You really want to date a barista? I know you can’t do much better,” he laughed a bit. “But a barista? At least get the manager.” 

Emma smiled up at him through bitter hatred. “It’s a temporary job, but trust me, Paul can’t get anything better than me. I’m just working while I do an extra college course, in botany.” She lied, to save Paul from his brother.

“Oh? You’re only going to college now?” Matthew said judgmentally, and Sheryl pricked her ears up, like this response would determine Emma's fate. 

“Actually-“ 

“How about we talk in the living room?” Paul interrupted, a bit too loud. Sheryl sighed. The questions could wait. “Emma, you should meet Aubrey, Matthew's wife.” 

The group moved into the living room, where a woman with light brown hair sat, peering over her shoulder at the door they entered, and a young teeager draped over a couch. The teen sat up, leaning against the arm of the couch when she noticed Paul and Emma. 

“Now, Emma, this is Aubrey, and Aubrey, this is Emma, Paul’s girlfriend.” Sheryl introduced. “That’s Gwen, Aubrey and Matthews' daughter.” 

Aubrey smiled at Emma. “Oh? How did you two meet?” 

“He lost his wa-“ 

“-Beanies.” Paul and Emma said over each other. 

“He left his wallet at Beanies-“

“And she was so nice, giving it back.”

Sheryl frowned. “Do you lose your wallet that much, Paul?” 

“Oh, yeah. He’s a real scatterbrain.” 

“Well, at least now he has someone to remind him to take it. He never had any girlfriends growing up, for a while, we were scared he might be, you know.” Sheryl wrinkled her nose. “Luckily, that didn’t happen. We can’t have that sort of thing going on in the family, even though we support it, of course.” She assured Emma, who was doubtful. “You were oddly close to that boy Ted, weren’t you? Why do you never have any guys nights with him?”

Paul waved awkwardly. “Oh, we aren’t that close anymore. We haven’t even really spoken in years.” 

“You were friends with Ted?” Emma said curiously.

“In high school. He wasn’t as bad then.” 

“Oh, is Ted acting up again?” Sheryl laughed. “Oh, boys will be boys. He was always a little rebel, getting Paul to do these crazy things.” 

“A rebel?” Emma elbowed Paul in the ribs playfully. He blushed at the contact. 

Sheryl waved a hand. “Enough about Paul, I want to hear about you, Emma. So how long have you and Paul been dating?”

Emma and Paul shared a panicked glance. “Um, four months?-“

“A couple weeks, sorry, go-“

“-no, you are right. We were just casually seeing each other for four months, but labelled it as dating just a couple weeks ago.”

“Mhmm.” Paul nodded awkwardly. 

“Well, I’m just glad you finally brought a girl home, otherwise there’d be no use in you even coming to family Christmas! I need more grandbabies! Just one isn’t enough!”

Emma looked over at the teenager on the couch. They were fiddling with a lock of their short, choppy hair, and half paying attention to something on their phone. 

“Anyways, what are your hobbies Emma?” 

“Uhh..”

“Emma likes flowers!” Paul interjected loudly.

“Really?” Aubrey spoke up again, after being totally quiet for a good while. “I’ve always loved making flower arrangements.”

“Yeah, I’m studying botany. Gonna start a po-“ Emma caught herself, realizing she was in front of her fake-boyfriends family and a kid. “Gonna start a potted plant collection?” 

“Oh, that’s so nice!” Aubrey clapped her hands together. 

“Having a little garden is a nice hobby to have, I loved flowers before the kids came along. Trust me, they'll take up all your time someday.’

“I don’t plan to have kids, actually.” Emma said cooly. For a moment, she wondered how she was able to pretend to be dating Paul so easily, but she pushed the thought out of her mind quickly. She was an incredible actor, she’d  _ slayed _ in Brigadoon. 

“Well, we should probably go start getting dinner ready.” Sheryl stood up, gesturing at the kitchen, trying to distract from the interruption of her plan for Paul, with 2.5 kids and an (optional) picket fence. 

Emma stood up, but was brushed back down. “No, you’re a guest- for now.” Sheryl winked. “We don’t get too fancy with Christmas dinner anymore anyways, since we don’t have too many of us. Paul has an older sister, a good fifteen years older, and she lives so far away she can’t come that often, and bring all the kids. We get plenty of emails, though.” 

She and Aubrey left, and Matthew stood up. “Paul, come with me, let’s get away from all these girls. Let’s grab a drink.” Paul let himself be pushed away, making a panicky apologetic face at Emma, who was alone with Gwen.

“Hi.”

“Hi. Were you about to say you plan to start a pot farm?” 

“No? You’re a child, you shouldn’t know about that I guess? Geez, I need to learn more about kids.” Emma muttered the last sentence to herself. 

“My parents don’t care if I know. Where were you gonna putit?” 

“Colorado.” 

“Cool.”

Emma leaned over a bit. “So, what are you reading?”

Gwen tucked their phone to their chest. “Nothing.” 

“Ok.” Emma leaned back, peering around the corner for Paul.

“You two are a cute couple.” 

“Oh, no, we aren’t-“ Emma stubbles, realizing that currently, she was Paul’s fake girlfriend. “I mean, thanks?” 

“What, are you fake dating him or something?” Gwen laughed. When Emma didn’t, they laughed louder. “Holy shit are you actually fake dating him? Well, you two are still cute. I hope I see you again at Christmas, anyways. For real,” They clarified. “Jeez this is the basic plot of so much fic, you two almost have to start dating.” 

Emma raised an eyebrow. “Why would we end up dating?” She wracked her brain, trying to think of a good defense. It has been years since she’d read fanfiction, not since high school. We’re just barely friends, it’s not like we’re hiding secret feelings or anything.” She said, oddly defensive. 

“Betcha.”

  
  


Over in the other room, Paul was having the time of his life. The worst time of his life, to clarify. He was being interrogated on Emma by his brother, but they seemed a lot like questions his mother would ask, not Matthew. It was bringing to light how many little things she did he had noticed, but how many concrete facts he didn’t actually know. Paul had brought Emma along to avoid questions by his mother about his love life, and the inevitable disappointment,, but he hadn't considered his mother asking questions about Emma. 

“So, have you two..”Matthew pauses, leaving the sentence open. “Mom wouldn’t like it, but me and Aubrey did it years before we got married, so..?”

“No!” Paul blurted, turning a deep red at the thought. Waking up with Emma beside him-no no no this was a fake relationship and that would never happen so why think about it? Thinking about it was as bad as trying to make her do it. “No.”

“Well, you’ll get there.” Matthew clapped Paul on the back. “It’s good you finally brought a girl! Mom was getting impatient.”

“Yeah. She was.” Paul frowned. He hadn’t particularly wanted a partner, ever. Until he first saw Emma at Beanies, he had never even really had a crush beyond years of teenage true love for one guy in high school. 

“Boys! Get in here! Paul, grab your Emma, Matthew, fetch your daughter.” Sheryl shouted from the kitchen. 

Paul rushed into the living room, where Emma was chatting quietly with his niece. They stopped once Matthew walked into the room. 

“Um, we have to go eat.” 

The short woman popped up. “Yes! Let’s go!” 

Paul wasn’t sure what Emma had been talking about to get her so flushed. He didn’t know his niece that well, his brother lived too far away to stop by for a visit. 

They sat down, where his mother was just putting down the final bits of food. 

“Alright, Matthew?” Sheryl asked. “Will you say grace, as the man here?”

“Paul is older-“ 

“Matthew.”

Matthew sighed, and prayed. 

“Now, what are we all thankful for?”

They went around the table. When it hit Paul he blurted out, “Emma.” Without thinking. He and Emma both flushed and looked away. 

Emma told herself it was just to keep up the illusion as she wracked her brain for something to say. Weed? They were all too conservative, she’d probably be killed for saying that. 

“Well, I don’t know how I can beat that. But I’m handful for..” Emma ignored the nagging voice in her head saying she was actually thankful for Paul. “Paul.” It fit, she was his fake girlfriend, and he was nice, a minute or so of fun during shitty days.

“Oh, you two are so cute. I can’t wait till you’re properly part of our family, Emma.” Aubrey said with a smile. 

None of Paul's family suspected a thing. Emma was just that good an actor. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I googled it and it’s totally plausible in canon that Paul and Emma could have read fanfiction so yeah  
> If you didn’t get the subtext there.. look at the updated tags  
> Also if you agree that almost everyone (minus sam. Fuck sam) in Hatchetfield is bi you’re legally obligated to comment /j and I hope you liked this chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paul and Emma are awkward. Very awkward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I’ve never been drunk I’m 14 don’t expect that part to be accurate!  
> Shorter chapter today but.. simps ur juice has arrived

“I hope you come back for Christmas, dear. Paul, you don’t let her get away. You need a nice girl, don’t go getting any more silly ideas.” Sheryl waved as the pair left. 

“Yeah, I’ll do that, mom.” Paul said awkwardly, like he had everything that night. It was too stressful, stick next to a fake affectionate Emma. He had gotten a little drunk, and had had to force himself to stay quiet, so he wouldn’t spill the beans. 

Emma took a deep breath once they were out of earshot. 

“Fuck, I see what you meant with pushy and vaguely homophobic. She really just wants your nuclear family, huh, Paul. Paul?” He had stopped responding in any way, just watching her. 

“Sorry. You’re just, really, really pretty.”

“Well, thanks.” 

Paul crumpled his hair, destroying the neatly brushed way it had been before. “No, you’re like, really, really really, really,really, really pretty. It's hot.” 

Emma peered at him closer. He didn’t look quite fit to be driving , and there was no way she was trusting herself. 

“How bout we walk?” 

They walked towards Emma’s apartment, the moon was just peeking through the clouds. Emma pulled her coat tighter around her. 

“Chilly tonight, huh?” 

Paul shook his head, zoning back in. “Oh. Yeah. Do you want..?” He trailed off, embarrassed. 

Emma waved him off. “I’m alright.” 

“Are you sure? I could, I hate this jacket.” 

“You know you can take it off, right?” Emma said, confused.

“No, I need to have the jacket on when I’m outside.”

“But you offered it to me?” 

“You needed it! You looked cold!” 

Emma flinched. “Paul, it’s ok, I don’t care if you wear the jacket or not.” She noticed him picking at the sleeves again, scratching at his wrists. She waited a minute or so before speaking up again. “Damn, it keeps getting colder. Do you still mind if I take your jacket?” 

“No! Take it.” Paul pulled off the jacket quickly, draping it over herself. He visibly relaxed once it was off, and Emma smiled. It had worked perfectly. 

She snuggled into the jacket. It was cold out, and the jacket was so warm.

Emma could remember multiple nights like this where she had ended up getting laid.

“Huh?” 

“Shit, did. I say that out loud?”

“Yeah.” Paul flushed. 

“Well, this kind of night leads to me getting laid. Moonlight, wearing their jacket, yknow?” 

“No.”

Emma nudged Paul in the ribs, laughing. “Have you never fucked? Never even did that stupid thing with the boom box in high school?” 

“I thought about it once. The boom box thing.” Paul clarified. Emma raised her eyebrows. “Spill.” 

“I was sixteen. There was this guy- girl.”

“It’s cool, I had a girlfriend for a couple weeks in Guatemala, I’m open to either, I don’t care if you had a crush on a guy.” 

Paul let out a sharp breath. “There was this guy, I had a huge rush on him, but we were childhood friends, and I was sure he was straight. Still, I thought if I did that he’d be overcome by emotion and kiss me or something.”

“Imagine how your life would have gone if you had done it. Do you think you would have tried to stay with him?”

“Yeah.” Paul frowned. “He’s not great now, though.”

Emma patted him on the back. “Well, too late now.”

She stopped walking. They were in front of her building. Emma looked up at the tall man. “Do you want to get wasted with me tonight?” 

Paul stopped dead in his tracks. “Sure?” 

“Cool.” Emma grabbed his hand, pulling Paul inside. They were both facing away from each other, trying to hide the blush from holding hands, but neither Paul or Emma was gonna pull away now.

Emma grabbed a sticky note once they got into her apartment, and wrote something she didn’t let Paul see as she grabbed a bottle of wine. She tucked it into her pocket as she poured the first glasses, and flopped onto her couch, handing the second glass to Paul. 

“Cheers.”

“Cheers.” 

They clinked glasses.

  * ••



Emma rolled over and groaned.  _ Fuck _ , her head hurt. She stretched again, and nearly fell off her couch. 

“Agh!” 

“Are you okay!?” There was a shout from behind her. Paul walked over and peered over the couch, seeing Emma hanging off of it. He hesitantly held out a hand, pulling her back up. 

Emma looked over the top of the couch, where Paul was just watching her. 

“How are you so casual?”

Paul shrugged. “I don’t really get hangovers.” 

“Lucky.” Emma muttered, rolling over the edge of the couch to grab a glass. “Why are you still here?”

Paul’s eyes widened. “I’m so sorry should I have left-“

Emma put a finger on his mouth. “Shhh. It’s fine, I don’t care, I was just curious. Did you fall asleep too?”

“Yeah.” Paul fidgeted with his sleeves. “I can make you food or something? I drank your wine, I don’t know if that really payment but still-“

Emma put her finger back on his mouth. Twice in a minute, that was kind of impressive. “You don't need to.” She smiled a bit. “At least I wasn’t drinking alone.”

“Ok but do you want me to make food?”

“Fuck yeah, I’m starving. I don’t think there’s a ton in the cupboards, I was gonna shop tomorrow.” Emma waved at the cupboards. “Go batshit, I’m gonna go change.” 

She pulled on a fresh tshirt to the flatter of bowls and pans. It had been nice, sitting there, getting drunk and chatting with Paul. He was sweet. And now she was getting dressed while he made breakfast. Weirdly domestic, and she didn’t mind. It wasn’t like they were dating, it was just two friends. As she pulled off her jeans, she felt a piece of something in her pocket. 

_ If we end up drunk and horny enough this is my consent _

Emma scoffed. Hah. She had been feeling weird last night, that was all. Entirely all of it was up to her feeling weird. All of it. 

Paul smiled up at Emma awkwardly from the table when she got back into the kitchen. His shirt was only half buttoned and his hair was still messy. It was cute. Cute was t normally an Emma thought, but with Paul, it had wormed it’s way into her mind, like everything about him. 

“I made waffles.” 

She made a beeline for the food, and started chewing furiously once she was sitting down across from Paul.

“ _ Fuck _ , these are incredible. Who taught you to cook like this? I might need to kidnap you so you can make me more waffles.” Emma drizzled more syrup over the waffles as she shoved them into her mouth. “I want to make sweet love to these waffles, damn.” 

Paul’s eyes widened. Ted had instructed him on opportunities like this, and Ted had plenty of relationships, this had to work. Tends usually didn’t last, but Paul was nicer than Ted, right? And Emma seemed to like him so far.

“Is the creator of them a decent replacement?”  _ Fuck _ . He shouldn’t have done that. 

Emma laughed a bit. “Sure.” She looked closer at Paul when he stayed, silent, noticing how utterly terrified he looked. “Shit were you serious?”

“No!” Paul waved his hands around frantically. “Ted told me to say stuff like that. I.. really shouldn’t have listened to him.”

“No shit.” 

“I do really like you though, Emma.” 

Emma stared for a second. “Like, like like? Want to be in an actual relationship with me like?” 

Paul nodded yes. 

“Well.. I, I don’t want to be in a defined relationship. Not because I don’t like you!” She tried to amend. “I do, I really do. But I do not like the labels thing before something gets serious. I saw too many people with issues because of that. I do want to be something with you, Paul.” She finished. 

“I want to be something with you, Emma.” 

“So, could I maybe kiss you?” 

“Please-“ Emma cut him off, planting her lips on his. They tasted like syrup and fucking incredible waffles. 

The waffles got cold. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it, a comment would be lovely! Next chapter will have the CCRP buds, so look forward to it!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paul is heckled and is awkward around Emma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ones a bit of a filler chapter, but I tried to make it funky enough to enjoy anyways.

Paul was blindsided. He had had sex, with Emma Perkins, for real, and she was actually interested in him. He had resigned himself to eternal pining a while ago, this was a very unexpected development. 

“So, how was your thanksgiving, Paul?” Bill leaned over with a smile. “Mine was great, Alice FaceTimed me and I got to talk with her! She’s looking forward to seeing you on Christmas.” 

“That’s great, Bill.” 

“So? How was your date?” 

“It wasn’t a-“ Paul stopped himself. He had spent time with Emma, they had eaten, and they had.. you know. Was that a date? “It wasn’t a planned date.” 

“Oh?” Bill scooched his chair over. 

“Don’t tell Ted?”

“Don’t tell me what?” Ted, as always, had terrible timing. 

Paul froze. “Nothing.”

“Ooh, you boned barista, didn’t you? Paul, you sly dog.” 

“Don’t you have printers to fix?” Paul asked miserably. 

“Nope.” Ted took a swig of coffee. 

Mellissa approached awkwardly. “Actually, Ted-“

“I’m helping Paul out right now.” 

“Oh.” Mellissa blinked. “Well, I’ll see if I understand what Charlotte needs fixed.”

Ted nearly dropped his cup of coffee, leaving it on Paul’s desk. “You know, I think Paul’s alright on his own now.” 

Mellissa winked at Paul as she led Ted away, and Paul’s phone dinged with a text. 

_ I wanna know too, or I bring Ted back over  _

Paul sighed. His coworkers were far too interested in his life. 

“So?” Bill said excitedly. 

“Yes, me and Emma did.. that. And I made her breakfast.” Paul said, crimson. 

“That’s great! Oh!” Bill raised his eyebrows. “Are you taking her to the Christmas party?”

“I’ll ask Emma, because we aren’t dating, Bill.” 

Bill blinked, confused. “But you two..?”

“We aren’t dating.”

“You just aren’t calling it that yet, then.” Bill decided. “I’ll start on the seating plan now.” 

It was Paul’s turn to blink in confusion. A seating plan. For the CCRP Christmas party. Ok. Ok. Sure. He redirected his focus to a report, if he could get focused enough, Ted wouldn’t bother him about Emma. 

The moustached man had learned that bothering a properly focused Paul was generally a bad idea years ago, because of a high school project. It had ended badly, but Ted knew the boundaries now. 

Paul pulled open a new tab. He would ask Emma about Bill’s idea next time he went to Beanies, he liked spending time with her face to face. 

Paul pulled his coat tighter around him as he headed down the street. A nice, hot, black coffee was all he needed. 

The bell above the door jingled as he walked in, and Emma looked up. 

“Hey! Paul!” She gave a little wave, a bit awkward. Neither was quite sure how to act after everything that had happened. There had been some quiet idle chatting before Paul headed home, but they hadn’t spoken since Sunday, so this was a new situation. 

“I’ll bring you your coffee in just a second, gotta get the kid his hot chocolate.” She jerked a thumb at the teenager who was there every day, even though school was happening as far as Paul knew. Maybe he was on his lunch break? It didn’t really matter. 

Paul sat down in the corner as Emma brought over his drink. 

“So? Latest CCRP scandals?” Maybe Paul was just imagining the awkwardness. 

“Hey?” She tapped him on the shoulder. 

Paul shook his head to clear his thoughts. “Sorry. Bill thinks you’re going to come to the company Christmas party.” He blurted out. “He thinks you're my girlfriend.” 

“Not a label on it.” 

“I know.” Paul couldn’t help but wish there was a label , that was what kept it secure, real. Still, Emma could have what she wanted with labels.

“I’ll come, though.”

“Really?” Paul choked on his drink. If Ted heard about this he was screwed. 

“Yeah,” Emma shrugged. “There’s always wild drama at company parties, and I don’t have anything better to do. God, I’m glad there’s not one here.” She rolled her eyes. “Can you imagine?” 

“Yeah.” Paul laughed. 

“Anyways, it’ll be nice to know some of your friends. maybe they have more about the CCRP drama you haven’t filled me in on yet today.”

“Not much actually happened today.”

Emma smirked. “That’s rare.”

“Ted actually left me alone, though. Mellissa told him Charlotte needed computer help.” 

“Oh yeah, he’s a tech dude, right. Has she caught on yet that he’s totally lost for her?”

Paul froze. “What? Ted’s not in love with Charlotte.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure he is, dude. Have you seen him around her?”

“He just wants to.. you know! What the hell.” Paul stared into his coffee. That put a weird twist on his life, even though it didn’t really affect him. 

“Sure.” 

“Emma! You never gave this boy his hot chocolate!” Zoey called over. 

“Can’t you do it?”

Zoey sniffed. “I’m on break.” 

“Yeah, for the past two hours.” Emma muttered, standing up. “Well, back to work for me. See you tomorrow, Paul.” 

Paul waved as she walked away, turning one last time to smile at him. “Bye.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ted is a Charlotte simp, not unlike me ✌️  
> If you liked it, a comment would be quite funky! Please drink water and consider going to bed if it’s past 11!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The CCRP Christmas party is here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t do math so you might get an extra chapter in a day or two if I’m wrong about math

Ted was so tired of these stupid parties. He was obligated to come, and hated it. Paul wasn’t even here for him to heckle yet. 

The man sighed as he poured a drink. Charlotte had even managed to get Sam to come, so he couldn’t talk to her without getting punched. 

Ted looked up, hearing a laugh. Paul was here. And not alone. That barista, Emma, was with him. Holding onto his arm. Ted has not expected this. He grinned. If he couldn’t have Charlotte, time for the next best thing. Annoying Paul.

Ted chugged the last of his drink and got up to sit next to Paul. He had surpassed the two drink limit by quite a bit, and when he started to get drunk, he got aggressive. If he got even more drunk, he’d get affectionate, but that would never happen.

“So, you’ve finally talked to the barista. Not the latte hotte, close enough.”

“I am the ultimate latte hotte, moustache asshole.”

“You were there when I talked to her, Ted.” Paul rubbed his eyes. Two minutes in and he was already sick of it. 

Luckily for Paul, that was when Bill showed up.

“Oh!” The man clapped his hands together. “You brought her, Paul!” He hurried up, sitting next to Emma. 

“Bill?” Emma pretended to guess, thinking it would seem weird that she knew all their names already. 

“Yes! Nice to meet you, Emma.” 

Seeing Bill, Charlotte scurried over, Sam looking incredibly bored behind her, still sitting and pulling out his phone.

“Is this the barista?”

“Yup.” Ted said lazily. “Wrong one, but a barista.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Charlotte smiled. “I’m Charlotte.”

“Cat sweater lady.” Emma nodded. “I’m Emma.”

Ted stood up, wrapping an arm around Charlotte. He didn’t seem to care that Sam was there, but the cop wasn’t paying attention to anybody but who he was texting. 

“How bout I get you a drink, Char?” He lead her over to the table, whispering something in her ear that made the woman blush, then glance worriedly at Sam.

“See?” Emma pointed at the pair. “He’s hopeless.” 

Paul sighed. “Fine. Is there anyone else Ted’s secretly in love with? Since anything is possible.”

“You never know, maybe he was in love with you before moving to Charlotte.” Emma laughed, poking Paul in the ribs. 

“Sure.” The tall man huffed. 

Emma and Paul were sitting relatively quietly, watching things unfold. CCRP drama had become Emma’s guilty pleasure, and while Paul still had to deal with the people involved on a daily basis, it was fun to watch. 

“Ugh. Does your boss even need to breathe?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Have you ever noticed he looks a bit like Sam?” 

“No? They look nothing alike.”

“You’re just oblivious, Paul.”

“Oh, Sams getting up! What’s he going to do, place your bets now.”

“Leave.” 

Emma snorted. “That’s depressing.”

“But right.” 

They watched Sam walk up to Charlotte, muttering something about work and shooting a glare at Ted, whose arm was still wrapped around Charlotte. 

“Called it.”

“You win this time.” 

The pair kept watching casually, muttering guesses and comments to each other. 

“Mellissa told me once about the time she walked into Mr. Davidson’s office while he was on the phone with his wife.” 

Emma groaned. “No. Poor Mellissa.” 

“Yeah.” Paul winced. “She’s scarred. Even after hearing the story I couldn’t look him in the eye for nearly a month.”

“Dang. Hey, more proof!” Emma pointed at Ted and Charlotte who were inexplicably still getting drinks. He had wrapped his arms further around her, and after Sam had left, Charlotte had sunk into Ted.

“You win.” Paul had lost track of the going ons in the room, focusing on Emma. He was also scared to look up after he’d caught a glimpse of Mr. Davidson with his wife, fearing seeing it again. 

Paul had never stayed at a company party this long, but for once, he was enjoying himself. Sitting with Emma, just talking and drinking. It was still a bit overwhelming, but if he just focused on whatever Emma pointed out, he could mostly drown out all the other sounds.

“Hey Paul? What time are we supposed to leave these?”

“Oh. I don’t know, I’ve never lasted this long.” He checked his phone. “We can probably go now.” 

“Do you want to? I should probably be studying right now, but Hidgens will forgive me, I’m basically his favourite student.” 

Paul tilted his head. “Who?” 

“Oh, my biology professor. He’s weird, lives in this bunker, got me to bring him groceries once. He thinks I’m great.” 

_ Who doesn’t? _ Paul smiled down at Emma. “Of course he does. You are great.” 

…

_ Wanna get ice cream? _

Paul smiled, hearing the little ding meaning it was from Emma. He looked down at his phone, and frowned. Ice cream was for the summer, you can't eat that in cold weather. He sent that to Emma, and she responded quickly.

_ But in summer it melts so fast _

_ At least now it’ll stay frozen _

_ Fair _

Paul responded, still not sure on the idea of ice cream in winter. 

_ So? Wanna get ice cream later? _

_ I guess _

_ I’m still not sure if ice cream is a winter snack _

“So? Winter snack, or nah?”

“No. I don’t actually like ice cream that much, even if it’s plain vanilla.”

“Wow, dull.” Emma teased. “How can you not like ice cream?” 

“Texture. And it’s too cold on my teeth. I like hot drinks and food better.” Paul revealed. 

“That’s a reason I’ve never heard before. Are you like that with other food, picky about texture?” 

“I’m not picky! Just.. particular. I like my routine, my certain foods, and it doesn’t need to change. It’s a nice, simple, existence.” 

“Wow.” Emma laughed. “We’re like, polar opposites. You like your routine, I like anything but. Leftovers from the rebellious teen phase, I guess.” 

Paul nudged her. “At least I moved on from my edgy teen phase.”

“No.” Emma’s jaw dropped.

“Yes.” Paul liked seeing Emma get excited and interested, she was especially cute then. 

“You had a rebel teen phase? Did your mom not make it like, illegal or something?”

“She tried. I was emo.” Paul flushed at the cringeworthy memories, pulling at his sleeves. “I couldn’t get the full look, but I had the band tees, skinny jeans, and tried to grow out my hair.”

“You had the haircut!?”

“I tried to.”

“Middle school or teenager us would have gotten along.” Emma ran a hand though her hair. “I was such a try hard punk. I dyed my hair, had fake piercings, it was terrible.”

“We could have angsted and listened to Green Day together.” Paul added.

“Yeah. Bet I could have outangsted you.” Emma shot back. 

“Probably. You can win at everything.” 

“Obviously.” 

They were quiet for a few moments, but Paul noticed Emma’s chipped black nails.

“You really still are emo?”

Emma glanced at her nails. “Oh. Yeah. I’m not very good at it.”

“You really aren’t.” Paul admitted. 

“Oh, like you’re much better?” Emma teased. 

“I am.”

“Mhm?”

“I painted my nails all the time as a teenager. I liked how smooth and shiny it was.” 

Emma tilted her head. “I hadn’t imagined little emo teen Paul with nail polish, but I can see it.” 

“I was skilled.” Paul laughed. 

“Maybe I should be hiring you to paint my nails.” 

“Maybe you should.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it, a comment would be great, I basically live off them!  
> Please go drink some water or your kneecaps will be liquified


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas at Bill’s house

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bill has Paul come over for Christmas every year and I will fight you on that

Paul was having flashbacks to about a month earlier at his mothers house as he got out of his car, early Christmas morning. Looking across the street at a house, next to Emma, (he still couldn’t believe that part.)

Paul smiled awkwardly. 

“So you come here every year?” 

“Since Bill's divorce. He invited me the first year he was going to be alone and now it’s tradition.” 

“That sounds fun. I’ve never really liked Christmas that much, it wasn’t great at my house growing up, too formal.” Emma laughed. “I mean, who even tells a seven year old to wear a dress and sit quietly for hours? I didn’t even like puzzles, but I spent hours on them over the years.”

“Are you good at them?”

“ _ Fuck _ yeah.”

Paul laughed as he rang the doorbell. Emma was incredible. 

Bill answered the door, tired, but smiling. Alice was there, his friend was there, it was going to be a great day. As long as Alice could keep away from Deb, at least.

“Merry Christmas, Bill.”

“Merry Christmas! Alice will be so excited you’re here!” 

Alice yawned as she woke up to a shout from downstairs. 

“Alice, sweetie! Paul is here!” 

Oh. Right. She was at her dad's house. She pulled on a sweater over her pajamas as she went downstairs, still bleary eyed. It looked enough like real clothes. 

Paul was sitting at the kitchen island with a vaguely familiar woman, and her dad was cooking something. “What’re you making, dad?” 

“Waffles!” He said cheerfully.

Alice wiped at her eyes. “Let uncle Paul do it, his are way better.” 

“Mine are great!” Bill protested. 

“Yeah, but uncle Paul makes even better ones.” 

“I have a cousin who’s a professional chef!” 

“In a tiny town with no internet, there’s not much competition.

“Connor Creek is a great town.”

“I have an aunt or something from there.” Emma interjected. 

“Really?” Bill stepped away from the counter to talk to Emma, and Paul quietly took over.

“Uhuh. She’s a travel agent.” 

“They probably know each other!” Bill exclaimed, lost in the odd world of adults realizing they have relatives that know each other. Alice had never understood why that was so exciting. 

“Hey, Dad?” She interrupted. “Can you drive me to Debs so I can drop off her gift? I promise I won’t stop and talk, todays family Christmas. Plus Paul. And.. lady who works at Beanies?”

“I’m Emma, I’m Paul’s.. something. Either way, I was invited, I’m here.” 

“Hi, Emma.” Alice turned back to Bill. “So, dad?” 

“Alice.. I need to stay here and make breakfast, can’t you drop it off later?” 

“She’s going to her grandparents in like an hour, and she’s staying there till really late.” Alice pleaded.

“I could? If Paul doesn’t mind me using his car?” 

“Really?” Alice lit up.

Emma looked at Bill. Did he want Alice going? “I’ll serve as chaperone for her.” 

Bill sighed. “Be quick, Alice.” Family-ish Christmas would still happen, it just needed a pause.  _ Deb made Alice happy. _ He repeated. Bill had been telling himself that a lot lately, trying to get used to it after they hit the one year mark. It showed a bit of commitment. 

…

“Thank you.” Alice said earnestly, climbing into Paul’s car. “Dad wasn’t going to take me.” 

“Can’t you drive? You’re what, seventeen, eighteen?”

“I don’t really get chances to practice, I don’t trust myself on the road quite yet.” Alice admitted.

“Oh, that sucks. I’m pretty out of practice, so if I run over a garbage can, don’t tell anyone.” 

“As long as you don’t crash us into a tree, I’m fine.” Alice laughed.

Emma flinched. 

It was a quiet drive. 

Emma grinned, watching Alice running at her girlfriend. She hoped it would work out for them. They both seemed so happy, Emma had never had that. 

Alice returned to the car flushed, with a huge smile. 

“So you’re uncle Paul’s girlfriend?” She said quickly, trying to distract from her red face. 

“His something. No labels.” Emma clarified.

No labels is what Emma had agreed on. Paul had been totally into it. Right?

Emma shook her head to clear out the invading thoughts. Enjoy a nice Christmas with people she barely knew. They were still better than her parents. 

…

The waffles were incredible. 

And the tree was lit, and it was snowing, a light, slushy snow, but still snow. It felt like a hallmark movie. Good thing Emma had a plan to be incredibly cliche.

Emma quietly took Paul’s hand as they left Bills house smiling, not saying anything.

“Do you want to get dinner or something?” 

“Now?” Paul glanced around the quiet street. Most people left Hatchetfield on Christmas, to visit family. “None of the good places are open.”

Emma grinned. “When I was a teenager, there was this little homey place that was open on Christmas every year, it might still be open.” She pulled Paul along, still gripping his hand. “They had such great food and it wasn’t actually shitty diner food. The lady who runs the place, her mom was apparently some secret agent in the 60s, and her wife was a scientist, and she’d tell me about it as a teenager. It was probably all made up, but I liked it.” Emma rambled on about the cafe, smiling from ear to ear. It was one of the few good memories from her teenage years. 

Paul listened quietly with a matching smile. The short woman getting all excited over something was adorable.

“Paul! It’s still here!” Emma stopped in front of a small building. “And open!” She whistled. “I never saw anybody but me even go in there, how the fuck are they still open?” 

“Maybe they’re committing tax fraud?” Paul suggested.

“Probably.” 

The  couple pair walked in, Emma still absently holding Paul’s band, and Paul having no intention of letting go. There was a red headed woman sitting behind the counter with a book,and she looked up. 

“Hi, can I help you? Technically we close in a few minutes, but I can still serve you takeout-“

“Mrs. Slozhno?” Emma blurted out. “You still run this?”

“Emma?” A smile spread across the woman’s face. “When did you get back here? It’s been what, ten years?” 

“I came back about a year ago.” Emma admitted. “I was caught up with Jane, and my botany stuff.” 

Mrs. Slohznos smile grew bigger. “You’re getting a degree? That’s wonderful! And in botany!”

“Hell yeah.” Emma threw up a peace sign for no explicable reason. “Gonna start a pot farm.”

Paul laughed. That was the first he’d heard of a pot farm. 

Emma turned and looked up. “What? Weeds the future!” She did some little move with her hands, smiling. 

“Mhm.”

Mrs. Slozhno leaned forwards. “So, is this your boyfriend?” 

“No-“ Paul started, interrupted by Emma. 

“Yes.” 

He stopped, surprised.

“Do you mind if we go sit down for a few minutes? I need to talk to Paul.” 

Emma pulled him to a table. They had stopped holding hands, but she grabbed his again. 

“So I know I said no label and it’s only been a month. I seem like a dick saying this, don’t I?”

“No-“

“Anyways, Paul, I really like you, and while I’m terrified of commitment, I would  _ really  _ like to call you my boyfriend.” Emma fiddled with her fingers. 

Paul was still confused. “Yeah.”

“Yes we can do the boyfriend/girlfriend thing or..?”

“Yes!”

Noting the end of the quick, slightly awkward conversation, Mrs. Slozhno sidled up. 

“So, do you two want food?” 

“Oh, yeah.” Emma glanced at Paul. “Surprise us? Or are there any foods you can’t stand like, texture wise?” 

Paul started. “Oh! No, not unless it’s ice cream or cold things like that.” She had remembered, and cared enough to ask. God, Paul liked this woman.

As they waited for the mystery meal, Emma leaned in. 

“So next year can I be a total dick to your mom? You won’t be able to get rid of me by then.” 

Paul pushed back a bit of her hair, still terrified out of his mind to be doing it. “Absolutely, Emma.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you caught all the references congrats ur royalty  
> Please drink some water, and if you liked it, comments sustain me!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An epilogue, sort of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys like this ending, anyways,,,, paulkins simps, your juice has arrived  
> I’m sorry it’s so short

Paul gulped, looking at the bright sparkle in the champagne glass. Now this was nerve wracking. It would go well, totally. Sure, cliche, but Emma liked that, secretly. He’d learned that once she had moved in with him a few months ago, and Christmas movies had started to show up. Of course, Paul couldn’t help but watch, just to keep Emma company, despite her insistence that he secretly liked them. When Emma stopped saying she watched Hallmark ironically, Paul would admit he enjoyed the cheesy romance. It had been two years, Emma liked him, he liked Emma, there was nothing stopping him.   
Paul grabbed another glass and drained it before walking over to Emma, who was fiddling with something plastic.   
“Do you want a drink?” He lifted the cup.  
Emma pointed her head at a glass that still had a bit of something in it. “I still need to finish that one, I’ll take that for later though.”   
She looked up at him, a sly smile on her face. “Do you want a candy?”   
“Sure.” Paul grabbed it from her hands, totally oblivious to anything out of the ordinary, consumed with anxiety.   
The ring pop was way too small for its packaging, that was such a ripoff. He opened it, and looked down to see.. a ring.   
Paul briefly stopped functioning, eyes bugging out of his head like whenever he was startled.   
Emma flushed. “Too cliche?”  
He pointed at the champagne glass. “I meant to.. you know.”   
The short woman grabbed the glass, and peered in to see the ring at the bottom. She fished it out, slipping it on, then dropped to her knee. “So?”  
“You’re still going to do that?”  
“Well, I’m down here, give me an answer.” She smiled up at him. Kneeling plus her stature combined for Paul being high above her.   
“Yes.” Paul said sharply, pulling Emma up. His fiancé. And he hadn’t had to do the scary part!  
“So are we going to seal the deal? I think it’s tradition.” Emma pulled Paul into a kiss, that was so, so cliche, with fireworks popping in the background. They finally pulled apart, breathless.   
“I never did tell my mom that we had a messy breakup.”   
Emma laughed loudly. “Yeah, with my terrible scandal. I was supposed to cheat on you with who, Ted? Or were you going to cheat with Ted?”  
Paul groaned. “You’re still going on about that? I was a teenager!”  
“Never gonna shut up.” Emma waved her hand, now adorned with a ring, in Paul’s face. “You can’t get rid of me now.”   
“I don’t want to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Consider making your final comment of the year on my writing? Go drink some water, please!   
> I really hope you guys liked this ending, while I’m not perfectly happy with this fic and would edit some of the last chapters a lot if I had the chance, I’m glad I managed to finish something,and it had a plot of sorts to it!   
> And if you like charted uhhh look out for my little New Years fic for they

**Author's Note:**

> We really did just go right into it huh  
> If you noticed errors, please roast me, I haven’t got a beta  
> If you liked this first chapter, I’d adore a comment, and if you’re procrastinating something with fic, go do it, or maybe sleep if it’s after 11 please


End file.
